Be more confident: 5 tips to help you

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What are the top 5 adjectives you would use to describe yourself? How about the top 5 adjectives others might use to describe you? Out of the combined list, was the word “confident” included? If you were to rate your confidence on a scale of one to 10 with one being least amount possible and 10 being most, what number would  you choose? Would you like be more confident?

In Webster’s online dictionary, confidence is defined as “faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper or effective way”. Other dictionaries mention “assurance of one’s powers and abilities” and “trust in one’s ability to complete a task”. Is it possible to not be confident but to have people perceive that you are? I would say it is definitely possible as I’ve experienced this many times in life. Often, the ability to act with confidence helps you BE more confident. Does that make sense?

Try these ideas to be more confident

Decades ago, I read a self-improvement style book that enlightened me about the benefits of “acting as if”. This basically means that when confronted with a situation where you are lacking confidence, you can overcome your anxiety by “acting as if”. Perhaps you’ve been asked to give a speech and are terrified of public speaking. To “act as if,” you would imagine yourself as a great orator. How would stand, what would you say, how would you feel?

Our brains have a difficult time differentiating between reality and fiction. If you “act as if” it actually helps you “become” that which you desire to be. It helps you be more confident! The following list contains several more helpful “confidence” tips for you to try:

  • Write a belief statement that affirms your beliefs and reminds you that you are a capable person. Here’s an example: “I believe that God will help me through any and every task He calls me to, and by His grace, I can overcome anxiety, adversity and feelings of inadequacy.”
  • Hang out with confident people. We are greatly influenced by our environment and by the people with whom we spend the most time.
  • Start a journal or chart and write down every instance you succeed in acting with confidence. Read your list often!
  • Adapt your perspective when the going gets tough. In other words, train yourself to look on the bright side and go from there.
  • Do you anyone who has become a great athlete without practicing? To gain confidence, you must practice being confident!

Often, we wind up really enjoying or showing great aptitude in the things we initially lacked the confidence to do. I recall being absolutely terrified the first time I was ever invited to host an online seminar for homeschooling mothers. Not only did I love it and become a regular guest speaker, the experience also led me to host my own Blog Talk radio show — something I never dreamed I would have had the confidence to do!

Who in your life exhibits the most confidence?

Have you ever noticed how uplifting it is to be in the presence of a confident person? If you know someone who possesses great confidence, ask what has helped him or her to be this way?

You might be surprised at how many apparently confident people actually struggle with anxiety, shyness or consider themselves introverts. They’ve simply  learned how to overcome their fears and rise above their self-imagined shortcomings to exude confidence in their interactions with others.

In what ways would you like to be more confident?

Where do you lack confidence the most in your life? We sometimes feel very confident in one area but not another. In addition to the 5 tips mentioned earlier, here’s an extra:

Write two lists, one including all the ways in which you feel most confident. In the other list, write all the aspects of your life where you are lacking confidence. Can something in your first list help you overcome something in the other list?  Are you naturally confident or do you have to work at it? What tips can you share with us for gaining confidence?

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