The Struggles of Being the Rarest Personality Type and Healthy Relationships

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There are an estimated 16 main personality types. One can determine where he or she fits in by taking one of several personality tests that are available online. Each classification comes with its predominant character traits with about three other facets that help drive one in their interactions with others. Of the 16 main types, there is one that pops up in approximately 1 percent of the population. This rare personality type is called the INFJ. This designation refers to Introversion (I), Intuition (N) Feeling (F) and Judgment (J). An INFJ is an introverted, extremely emotional and empathic person. He or she tends to be able to sense and reflect the moods and emotions of those around them and want very much to fix problems they see in others.

They also often take on the emotional energy of those with whom they have contact and as a result, they often need more time alone than the average person in order to recharge their batteries and reset their emotional balance. INFJ’s also tend to make snap judgments about certain situations and circumstances and to cling to those opinions. Once they have been hurt repeatedly by a person or a situation, they are inclined to shut the door permanently on a painful relationship.

So, how does this personality maintain healthy relationships? It isn’t easy. An INFJ tends to want to fix others and heal those who are hurting around them. As a result, they often remain in a relationship long past the point when it should have ended. This personality type is often taken for granted and seems to draw the attention of dominant and controlling personalities since they try to avoid conflict and confrontations. They also attract those who display narcissistic tendencies. INFJ’s make easy targets for abuse — especially emotional and mental abuse. This makes it difficult for an INFJ to draw lines and end a relationship, even when they have been used and mistreated.

It isn’t just romantic relationships where INFJs struggle to maintain healthy boundaries. Because this personality type loves solitude and quiet, he or she is less likely to have a large circle of friends. Those that are selected to be a close friends, are truly trusted and beloved people which again may leave him or her vulnerable to situations where he or she will be used. They are also rule followers so that they don’t stand out and be noticed, which make them a target for others when they have a task they wish to foist off on another.

When it comes to parents and relationships with their own children, they are frequently misunderstood and misinterpreted. INFJs are dreamers and try to see a different way of accomplishing a task or seeing a problem. Parents think that these kids are just day dreamers and not focused enough and children may view their INFJ parent as too touchy feeling and emotional.

So, overall, if an INFJ is in your life, cherish them and don’t take them for granted.

Writer Bio:  Angela Mose

I am a mom of 7 who has successfully homeschooled for 20 years.  I was married for more than 25 years and have recently started my life over. I have a passion for writing and music and when the two can be combined, it is utopia.  A Maryland native, I am planning to relocate north in the near future and will continue to strive to learn and experience new things on a regular basis. I am fortunate enough to be able to work from home while exploring new ways to increase my knowledge and skills and help improve the lives of those around me.

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